Tag: complain complain

I’m not going anywhere yet, I’m still here

B. Zedan

I never actually wanted to live in Portland. I just knew it’d be a better choice. Like I knew it was a better choice to wait longer and save more before moving to L.A., even if it meant Chase moved down there a couple years before I did. I think the last time I was in California I was 16. Maybe even 15. Somewhere around then my dad’s family stopped being my family and there was no reason to go south. If you’ve grown up in Oregon, California is sort…

Also, Chase was a kitty for Halloween

B. Zedan

Oop, it’s been a bit. Without the monthly focuses to keep me shame-tied to blogging, I’ve forgotten the habit. Though, to be fair, I’d been out of the proper habit for a while (which is true of most folks, it seems). What have I been doing. Hmm. A big chunk of October was spent making San’s mask and cape (from Princess Mononoke) for a friend. I am a huge costume nerd and since they never drew San’s cape as actually attached in any way, that’s how I made it. It…

Focus month(s): Nails, fail

B. Zedan

Well, I can admit it. I totally failed at my month of nails. First I decided to extend it through May and about a week ago I realised that there was no way I was going to meet my goals. Lame. But hey, at least I can admit it. No excuses, I just lost the drive during the bleh period of time I am calling Maypril. Failure happens, and my monthly focus thing is not going to stop because I screwed up one month. There will be a focus for…

A New Year

B. Zedan

One thing I can acknowledge, despite the persistent strands of self-doubt I am slowly cutting away: I can teach myself any art or craft technique and make something halfway decent with it if I want to. I’m not going to be a genius at it, necessarily, but I can do it. Even back when I was just a painter I was interested in the process, which is most likely why I didn’t stay just a painter for long—and I was doing film photography, emphasis on darkroom work, and theatre and…